Emperor Barack Obama is back, and he's got some new clothes to sell

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On the first night of the Democratic National Convention (DNC), any number of absurd excuses were to blame as they pushed Joe Biden’s speech into the early hours of the morning to try and make sure no-one saw it.

And surprise surprise! All these little glitches just…went away on night two, culminating with the return of Barack and Michelle Obama.

You think Jesus is popular?

The crowd went wild. Real-life adults had tears in their eyes, transfixed on the return of their messiah. Some were so excited they accidentally impregnated the people in front of them.

For Democrats, the Obamas are like crack. People just can’t get enough.

And don’t get me wrong: their speeches were phenomenally delivered. Contrary to the idea that Barack Obama is one of the best orators in the history of American politics (he’s not), it was actually Michelle who stood out (again) as the leader of this particular power couple.

But unlike too many Americans, I care far more about what they say than how they say it.

And what they said should terrify you.

First, it wouldn’t be a speech from an Obama without equal doses of arrogance, condescension and a complete lack of self-awareness.

They both decried the influence of fame and fortune, despite becoming immeasurably wealthy after leaving the White House after running an administration that merged celebrity with politics.

When you have Beyoncé on speed dial, you don’t get to lecture me us on this stuff.

Barack Obama criticized cults of personality — yes, really — and Michelle Obama even decried Donald Trump’s “affirmative action of generational wealth”, which must be bad news for the Obama’s daughters!

Guessing they’re not getting a penny of Barack and Michelle’s millions.

He warned of climate change without mentioning his beachfront property.

He talked about world peace without mentioning the innocent people (including American citizens) he bombed.

Oh, and he called for decency before immediately making a small dick joke.

Not only is this who the Obamas have always been, the Democratic Party couldn’t care less. They’d sell their unborn child if it meant a chance to bask in the glory of the Obamas…and Planned Parenthood actually parked a bus outside the DNC that can help them do just that.

It’s obvious that the Democratic Party is still the party of Barack Obama and Michelle Obama. Joe Biden — who is still President of the United States, by the way — is more of a janitor left in charge while the owners go to Martha’s Vineyard for a really long weekend. But now that Joe is “retiring,” they need someone to work the door while they focus on hanging out with Jay-Z and/or running the country. Enter Kamala Harris.

The only problem? Kamala Harris is an awful candidate.

She’s the same candidate who flamed out of the 2020 primary race before a single vote was cast, and at Joe Biden’s side, she’s overseen rampant inflation, an illegal immigration crisis, and the explosion of conflict across the world.

All without being able to string a sentence together without a teleprompter and calling for Soviet-style price controls.

But not to worry: Barack Obama and Michelle Obama are here to sell you a new reality. A better reality. A fake reality.

In this reality, Kamala Harris — the woman who laughed about smoking marijuana while locking up people for smoking marijuana — “cares”.